I don't know
That's what I say when I'm just too LAZY to think about ANYTHING.
Saturday, April 19, 2008
hi. today is erm, quite shitty. yea. dun ask me why the font white, cos i cant change it too. i looked at the code but cant figure out where go wrong. yea bear with it till i get a better skin. sorry.
went late to meet them as i had tuition. so yea, sorry for being late. had brunch with them at tmall de kopitiam. brunch was quite. i mean among us. the rest of the ppl were like talking in a wet market. so yea. everyone din finished their food except youming. and den she self-praised herself for eating finish her food. lol.
took weekend today on the way to tmall. realised that it dirtied my clothes few hours ltr. wearing white shirt so yea... they went to precious thots to have a look and i followed in, while reading my today. so yea, was quite zor theng cos i was standing in the way.
went bak to library with them to realise there's no seat for me. so yea. gotta find a seat somewhere before i can start study. bid farewell and start findng a good spot, or u can say any spot.
found a spot on the kid's corner, but got shoo-ed away in less than 10mins. 此处不留人，自有留人处。so yea. left for downtown east BK. cos i dun wan be shameless and get shoo-ed away. dammit. i'm pissed.
finished my hcl paper 2 and chankai came. somehow, though i din organise to meet up with him. but anw, he came. but we sat on diff tables till i finished my hcl paper 2. that's the only thing i completed today. cos i was really pissed with that librarian. and i've got literally pangseh-ed. sudn't have even came out in the first place. stay at home play com would have been better. i'm really pissed abt today.
did the usual stuffs with chankai. and i tot, chankai though isn't in the same class as me, but our friendship still remained quite good. why can't i just get another good friendship in the current class? our class is havoc. all sorts of nonsense inside. i mean seriously. why cant i see any true friendships in our class? their attitude just change, and u will just feel cold. in just a snap. maybe true friendship doesn't come just when u want it.
i still feel i'm not important. i'm just another person in this world. with no cliques. loner may just be the best job i can find now. but well, it'll still be a good thing ain't it? at least i could have more time to study to kill time instead of joking around with friends. but i must say, i really miss those times.
why isn't hard work paying off? why? why wad i do just doesnt make you feel anything? why? why doesn't wad i say is important to u? why? why doesn't you care about wadeva i do? why?why doesn't things just work out for me? why? i've got so many why that i don't think i'll ever make it dissappear.
the world may not be better without me, but i guess it does not make much a difference. no me, no more cold jokes, no more crap, no more sick of hearing self praising, no need to lend money, no need to listen to philosophies, no need to wait for him, .... mayb i sud jus lone. like l-o-n-e. after sch hide in some place to just study, alone. just do evrything alone.
i should just study, neglect everything else. just study, study. den mayb some day i'll bcome so great person after doing all those studies. but, no friend. wad are friends? nth. i guess. they'll just leave u, anw. nothing last forever. metal rusts, organisms dies, stars explodes, phones spoils, enzymes denatures, clouds disperse, faeces decompose... nothing last forever, indeed.
ok, i guess i'm getting too much stress. or sud i say, giving myself too much stress. i've never get so emo sia. dammit. hope this o lvl thingy would bring away all my stress. dam o lvl. dam dammit. stop telling me wad i sud do, and wad i sud not. don't assume that i go out to play. ok, wadeva. explaining doesn't helps. i sud not care abt opinions alr.
i care, so what? you don't care. so what's the use if i care? patience is really going off. mayb i really nid to go to the beach and stay there while i ponder for the whole day. it'll be good of course, if i had a listening ear that i could trust. u nid a best fren for that, but well, i dun have. so yea. just let me be alone.
lucky the fonts are white. :) life sucks. but so what? i'm gonna reign even if it sucks. i'm gonna make it rocks even if it sucks. just u wait, life. u cant beat me. i may be a nobody now, but i'll make sure i'm gonna be somebody.
I don't want nobody else
Without you theres no one left