I don't know
That's what I say when I'm just too LAZY to think about ANYTHING.
Sunday, May 18, 2008
hi. went to beach today. to have a tiny break after a week's break. reached the beach around 2pm+ and started to enjoy the breeze and pondered... there was only a couple there, at the far left end. so i sat at opp end. they left after a while. guess they had smth else to do or could have been there for a while alr. so i went to their spot; it was the same spot where me and chankai settled down ytd. eew... i tot. guess wad i saw? 3 prawns (1broken into parts) with flies flying around. zzz. so i moved a little away.
saw this really huge ship, the kelong seemed so small as compared to it. 1/4 of the ship would be enuf to destroy the kelong. luckily the captain controlled it well, it din bang into it. it looked smth like this:
that's the ship. and the small little thing near the end of the ship is the kelong. the ship is at the background of the kelong. big right? the ship.
sweat quite abit, cos the breeze was rather inconsistent in supplying the wind. and stayed there quite abit, so now a little more tanned.
walked to downtown east BK, supposedly to study there. but it was packed, so plan B. that is to go whitesands KFC. luckily there were seats, and it wasnt at all packed. so ate my brunch there and studied chem's enthalpy change. realised i din know much abt enthalpy change. after reading finish, understood more why each reaction is reacted that way and wad does it affect. for instance, delta= change, H= energy amt. and when the reaction is exothermic, the initial substance will have a higher energy lvl den the product as heat is lost frm the chemicals to the surrounding, hence delta-H is negative. bcos the energy is given out. so lost energy. yea.
window-shopped and realise i wanted to buy sooo many things. but no money._. sian diao. jus to name afew, psp, sports shorts (probably basketball pants), track shoes, outdoor shoes, rare earth magnet (for dnt project), a new TAPz card (someone took mine during chalet last yr, and it dissappeared frm earth eversince PS: topped up $5 somemore and din use even a cent of it._.), supplementary books for my subjects... jus these alr cost me hundreds. & it's not inclusive of wad im gonna wear for prom. hmm... gg.
anw, bought amaths supplementary book. it was really good. so i bought it. hope i would improve my amaths with the help of it. :)
ok, that's abt it. gonna go for a run at MJC liao, den go west plaze makan dinner. so bye. :) oh yea. i finally understand why issit E=MC^2 liao. its some physics formula. and mariah carey's initial is MC. so she tried to make the link... hmmm... dun say i lag lar. she nvr tell i can realise that is alr quite a feat. :P
i thought abt it today. went specially to the beach so that i could sort out wad i really want. and after a few hrs of thoughts, i din really come up with a conclusion. but one thing's for sure- i love you and i dun wanna give u up. so after that few hrs of pondering, i went elsewhere to ponder, while walking. stopped at the bus stop near downtown east/e!hub. waited for buses. but i din hitch any of those bus which could bring me to whitesands- my destination. was really tired after walking all the way out frm the beach to downtown and walking rounds there. suddenly, i thought of u. and another thought struck my mind- i've came all the way frm the beach here, it's just a little more than a stone throw away to whitesands. i've walked so far and suffered so much, be it the hot weather and the heavy bag, and i'm almost reaching my destination. why give up now? i sudn't. i gave in so much and victory is near. why sud i give up now bcos i feel sad? if i gave up, all that have done will b gone down the drain. no. i sudn't give. so i tot it is similar to wad i'm facing with u now. i know u do feel for me, but jus that bcos now, i feel i'm not good enuf, i gave up. without ur consent. that's very selfish of me. i saw couples who doesnt really seem compatible to me, but their care and concern for each other touched my heart. wad bonds the two couple together is not jus their appearance, but the effort and care and love for each other. and that's wad matters most. i'm sorry for being selfish and thought of giving up. but now, after all those thoughts, i concluded i sudn't give up now. it's nvr been a one sided. frm ur reactions to everything i do, i can feel that. and the 9pm show that time the zhiling oso said, "u can feel whether the other person feels for u too." i'm not gonna give up. the words u said, the lyrics of the songs u want me to know plays in my heart. everything's gonna be just fine, no more negative vibes. yes. i'm sorry for thinking that way ytd. i'm truly sorry. though i guess u will never see this, but well, i just wanna say i'm truly sorry. i dun care if chengboon see this, he's not suppose to anw. :/ but well, it's my heart felt words. so dun u laugh, chengboon._. ltr u stuck in the same situation den i laugh at u den u know._. oh yea. thanks doraemon oso! this morning somehow i woke up den the tv was showing doraemon. just nice they were singing the opening theme song. mayb it wasnt coincidence, god wanted to convey me some msg. the show, to my surprise, were in the same situation as me. i mean 大雄. he liked 静香. but after he was scolded by his tcher, telling him that he'll nvr ever succeed in his life, he decided to give her up, cos he din wan her to suffer with him. he felt he wasnt good enuf. same situation as me. lols. so he tried so stay far away frm her, even to the extent of purposely making her hate him. doraemon gave him a pill which makes ppl hate the person who ate it after 大雄 keep begging and pestering him. but he ate the whole packet instead. cos the effect would be stronger. but after that, he due to the effect of eating too much, he felt very very uncomfortable. evryone frm the house ran away. and den 静香 came. she initally oso wanted to leave. but after hearing 大雄's cry for help, she forced her way in to help him. so sweet... den after that 大雄went to the toilet den okay liao. so 静香was worried and she cried and say he made her so worried and stuffs. and in the end happy ending lar. den doraemon said, "haiz, u so stupid go think abt those negative things and went through so much trouble which is totally unnecessary." yes. mayb it's true for my case. but i din really understand it until now. thank you doraemon. :))
But baby, baby
I stay in love with you